Back Me Up Scotty!

I recently was talking to a female friend of mine, we were out and about at a bar, discussing how people around us were all coupling up and planing their nuptials. At that point she made the deal of her life, she said "well if we are both 35 and still single, why don't we get married." Wow what a proposal I thought, too bad it was the 10th backup marriage I had been offered in as many years.

The hysterical part is that women actually think that they are doing you a favor, their narcissism extends to their perception that it would be a privilege to be her last resort. In return I the man gets a depreciated asset, sagging, older, and not nearly as perky about all of the "benefits." To all my women followers, its not that I think all women age terribly, the reality is as we age, men get better looking, while women fight the good fight.

In the end the older man if he desires can always trade in the old wife for the newer model. I do not in anyway endorse this, I am only saying what is the benefit to me to get a wife outside her prime and have it be a blessing. In the end I guess my annoyance is with the fact that for some reason right now I am undatable, but in the future when the world comes crashing to an end, suddenly, I will be a hot commodity, let me say I will be waiting on the edge of my seat. I would like to feel that if I am getting into a long-term relationship, that I would be worth the risk now, rather then when you have no options left.

In essence a woman is saying you can be my backup because:
1. You're not good enough for me NOW and I can get better.
2. Hopefully, you will age well and become distinguished.
3. Depending on how successful you become I will judge whether or no to be with you depending on how much "allowance" I will receive.
4. At that point in my life I will be too tired to give bjs and hjs so our sex life will be as bland as two hermaphrodite hookers.
5. My desperation to have kids will reach a boiling point as the clock is ticking.

The reality is, no one wants to be someones backup, its a flat insult to proposition a guy especially when both of you are single, if there is a chance even down the road, get off the high horse and give it a shot. The only way someone like me would make that deal is if I get a down payment now, graduating interest payments over the future, and the ability to opt out in the end. If you are down to make that deal, lets shake on it, or rather shake it on me.